There's rosemary, that's for remembrance.
William Shakespeare: Hamlet, Prince of Denmark

Friday, August 21, 2015


Buttons.  Get it...So (sew) buttons.  I heard that on a TV show.

I was up early today; had a big appointment with a 3D machine.  I showered; no lotion, deodorant or perfume.  I arrived at 8:25 AM for an 8:30 check in and an 8:45 appointment to have a bilateral diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound for a left breast lump.  They ushered me to the back right at 8:45.

The Women's' Imaging Center is brand new at our local building, new machines, new everything.  Very fancy.  A 3D mammo still requires 6.3 pounds of pressure with your breast smashed between two clear plastic plates, but the machine ticks around the plates and takes the images that are immediately on the technician screen and then sent to the IN HOUSE RADIOLOGIST.....wheeee, thank you dear Lord.  The radiologist read the mammo and said do the ultrasound.

Brand new ultrasound machine, said Nancy, the tech.  And.....let the ultrasound begin.  Nancy had a hell of a time finding said lump.  Left breast lump had a little sticker left over from the mammo and she marked it with a pen, but it was playing hide and seek and then, boom.....there it was. Click, click over and over and then Nancy went to show her fine results to the IN HOUSE RADIOLOGIST!

I know anyone that might read this skipped over all of my humorous stuff and is gonna read what comes away.

The IN HOUSE RADIOLOGIST does not know what my lump is. Get didn't show up on the mammo...nope, not at all.  It isn't indicative of a cyst normally found in breast tissue, it might be indicative of a cancer, but probably not, it might be something like a skin cyst....a sebaceous cyst, but maybe not.  He has no clue what it is.  He felt it, he sees it on ultra clue.  He would normally do a needle biopsy right then and there, but the type of lump he "needles" are not close to the surface like mine and the needles he has are too big.  I need to see my primary doc and get a referral to a surgeon that is a breast specialist. 

So, today is all buttoned up as far as boobs go.

We were approved for the HELOC after we jumped through the first ring of fire.  There will be several more to tackle.  Our daughter (Steve's Stephanie) got through surgery fine and our other daughter (my Christine)  goes under the knife next Thursday.  I see my primary doc next Wednesday at 1 for an exam and referral. I haven't told any of the kids about this boob adventure....they have enough to worry about day to day without adding mom to the list. No, they don't read my blog.  I got through the heart attack without them here and this could be a piece of cake or at least a mounds bar compared to that.  Steve, on the other hand, was a bigger puddle than I expected.  I asked the IN HOUSE RADIOLOGIST to please explain the results to him and he was OK until we got in the truck.  Then after we were done cruising around the market he stopped in the parking lot mid loading the truck of fresh stuff and just hugged me and snorted on my shoulder.  I waited until we got home to cry.  I see my cardiologist early October unless I have something other than just an easy peasy little lump removal.  So my social calendar is full folks; no invitations to wine tasting or lake cruises , please.

Did I mention I fell in WalMart Wednesday......I did.  There was a clear, little, quarter sized plastic water bottle cap that someone generously dropped or tossed in a main aisle. My right foot hit it just right and I totally splatted on the floor landing on my left knee and arm.  I was pissed and embarrassed all at the same time.  Nothing broken or badly injured, but I made the 12 year old manager fill out a ream of paperwork anyway just to be a bitch. 

On a really wonderful note, the 19 year old guy across the street is volunteering and fighting some of our 80 fires on his 2 days off....Wednesday and Thursday. 

I'm off to bigger and better things today....not sure what other than cleaning the litter boxes and hugging Steve a little tighter......but, that is the wonder of retirement....nothing to do!


jp said...

Aw, I think this Steve person is rather sweet on you. You should totally give him your phone number ;)

This sounds like good news, Rosie. I'll keep sending hugs and light your way until this all goes away and you have the all clear (but not too much light, I don't want to start another fire.)

rosemary said...

jp....I am absolutely convinced this lump is nothing but badly whipped mashed potatoes. I did give Steve my number, and he called....actually he spent the night. The fires are really, really scary. We were closed up in the house most of yesterday. Thank you jp for your kind words.

booda baby said...

Really. If we were all in Talk to Rosemary Show, I'd lobby the director really, really hard to not follow JP. He says what wants saying so beautifully and truly. Hmph.

I imagine it would be nice if all things were explained, but since they're not, it's a pretty good occasion for all of us to think: well, there you go. Mysteries of life. Ok. Keep pouring on the love and healing energy.

rosemary said...

jp is really pretty amazing, booda. I forgot to mention that my primary doc called late yesterday long after I had written this....he already sent the referral to the surgeon on my Medicare Advantage they should be calling hopefully Monday to make an appointment. This should all go away really soon. I need to start worrying about the house appraisal, my daughter's surgery that is now postponed until 10/1 because she needs an echocardiogram and cardiac workup and the fires and my broken vacuum and I am sure there will be other things I can come up with. Thank you, booda for remembering.....your comment was there in my mind throughout the morning...seriously.

booda baby said...

1. He IS. And not in a sentimental way, but in a real, he's extraordinary way.
2. Oh, I like a primary doc and staff that gets stuff done! That's fantastic!
3. We are SO wired differently, aren't we? I try worrying (sometimes it creeps up on me accidentally) but it shuts me down SO much and sends me flying down that fucking slippery slope and then I just want to slap people, so I do stuff especially to NOT worry. I wish I had a little more fun doing it. Ha. Even fires (we get them, too) that are crackling their way straight to us don't make me worry. I think we like preparing and getting all our neighbors in order. (Okay, I don't like that part so much, but Andy does and we're a team, so ... sigh.)

and finally, ta da,

4. Remembering. Easiest thing in the world to do. You had the tough part. I'm glad you hear some love whispering in your head, though. There's a whole lot I don't believe in, but energy, focused - THAT, I do. Seems to me that our mutual friends excel at it, so ... you've got some extra buoyancy.

Anonymous said...

Why does gravity hate you?!?! At least you are bitty and don't have as far to fall. Yes that was a short joke. I'm sorry your schedule is so chock-full of frail humanness. I'm kissing your not quite fuzzy/not quite Brazilian head. Please include my arms in Steves next hug. I love you xoxo

rosemary said...

Had the whole blogging thing not happened again I would be going thru this by myself.... with Steve's help of course....but he sort of has to. He is a captive audience. You have no idea....well, maybe you protected I feel right now. How could anything be wrong when people that have never even seen me....except for my daughter about me. As for fucking Walmart, the "manager" said the store big poobah would call me the next day; he did not. The store "manager" also said the corporate loss poobah people would be calling the next day too; they have not. The thing that pisses me off the most about Walmart is we have very little choice as to where we shop. While I would love to support the little local places sprinkled about town THEY WANT A SHIT LOAD OF MONEY for something that is 1/4 the price at Wallie World. Kisses to all of you.

Bad Alice said...

Wal-mart doesn't give a shit about anything - not their employees, not their customers, not whatever third-world children are making the stuff. The invisible "fuck you" fee that gets added onto the cheap prices. It doesn't keep me from shopping there, because, yeah, budget.

I'm glad you're going to get a breast care specialist. They've seen everything and should be able to put your mind at ease and give you a clear course of action. You have so much going on it's good you have a doctor on top of things.

rosemary said...

Bad Alice, when I was a nurse case manager the worst insurance coverage and benefits were those of Walmart coordination of was they need to be discharged now,don't care what their condition is....if I had a hospice patient but they only had home health benefits...nope we won't let you use them, just get the patient home caregiver or not. Their employees here are the most downtrodden people you will ever meet. My doc does come thru every now and then. He has had his not so special moments, but he eventually redeems himself. This whole boob thing has actually gone really smoothly in spite of me.